I had a laugh with my good friend Monique the other day… she was telling me how she’s got a mouse problem… and the mouse is hiding in the kitchen somewhere…
The Funny part wasn’t the fact that there was in the kitchen… in fact Monique is terrified of the little thing… the funny part was how she discribed her kitchen
“It’s like a death trap Goose” she said
“There are traps and poison all over the place” she then chuckled…
It was a little bit funny however after I thought about it for a while I thought… isn’t it strange that we are so willing to get rid of a mouse, a wasp , even a spider from our house that in a years time… in two years time… will have no impact whatsoever on our lives, yet we sit and stew on things in our lives that can destroy us… but not only ourselves but those around us.
Lately I’ve been hearing a lot of people who are in relationships where there is anger issues and it’s tearing these couples apart… why?
Because there were issues before hand that hadn’t been dealt with properly before hand…
The problem with Anger is that it isn’t like a stop gate where you can just let things in.. or our… but it’s like an account balance it’s saying “You took something from me and I will keep pushing until I feel I have been compensated,” the problem with this is that often you’re not even with the person who wronged them. Some one somewhere in this persons life hurt this person… but instead of dealing with the issue… they hid it deep down inside…
Anger is something that you need to deal with as soon as you can… there is an old proverb that says “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger…”… you see don’t even let it get to the end of the day before dealing with it… in other words keep a short account of your anger.
The reason for this is when you don’t deal with it it jumps from relationship to relationship with the person who is angry… now there’s an even bigger problem because they are now angry… but they don’t know who they’re angry with… or what… so they will just snap at things that make them feel vulnerable. They’re taking the pain, hurt, and rejection from one season of their life to the other.
They start to loose sight of what makes them mad… and they make excuses about what makes them angry and they blame others, and the people they blame may not be the original source of the pain!
It happens a lot in marriage… and we’re starting to see it more and more.
It doesn’t matter how cute a guy is, or how sexy a girl is, or who he is or where he has come from or if you think you are best friends… if you are going out with a guy or girl who has anger issues… run for the hills… get out of it when you can!
“But we’re in love!!!”
I know this sounds harsh but “Get over it”… get out of there while you still can… MOVE ON… because either you break it up now… or they will crush it out of you later.
Because you are going to be consistently blamed for things that you will never understand.
You can apologize hundreds of times, you can say sorry, and no matter how hard you try you will never feel like they will let you measure up to their debt… and the reason why?… because the debit is most likely not with you!
You are just bumping into wounds that they brought into the relationship.
Ephesians 4:31 says “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior” (NLT)
You see it’s like if you get diagnosed with cancer… you don’t ask where you got it from… you just want to get rid of it…
So why do we let these things so close into our hearts that we are willing to suffer the rest of our lives for it???
How long are you willing to have anger in your home?
Get rid of it… do not have it in your life… and if you are the one with the anger issues… take time think back and find out where it originated… because the people around you shouldn’t need to suffer for your actions.
And if you are thinking of getting married someone with these issues… get out of there while you can… don’t let it crush you… and what ever you do DON’T make excuses for it!
Because if it has come up already in your relationship it will again and again and again.
If you were the God who loves you so much that he was willing to send his only son to die for you and would do anything for you…
What would you expect him to want you to do?